"To err is human."
How do you deal with mistakes?
We all make mistakes. It's easy to forget that when we're in the midst of a mess-up.
But it's impossible to avoid miscalculations, mishaps, both big and small.
And have you found that the busier you are, the more mistakes you're likely to make? Maybe you've hurt someone's feelings by saying the wrong thing at the wrong time. Or left the water running and flooded your home, or fumbled the presentation in a meeting, or maybe you lost a client?
No matter how impeccable you are or how perfect you feel like you could be, the question is not whether you will make a mistake, but it's "Will you own it?" Will you stay positive? Will you move forward from life's inevitable ups and down?
So how do you bounce back from a mistake?
I'm going to share with you three things you can do to put mistakes behind you? And the three things aren't panic, make excuses,...
It's funny how we can find it so easy to love other people and yet find it so difficult learning how to love yourself.
I think it's because we've been taught that loving ourselves is selfish or conceited in some way.
After all, nobody likes a narcissistic person who never seems to care very much about anyone else.
But there's a huge difference between loving yourself and being narcissistic!
Loving yourself doesn't mean you think you're better than anyone else.
It's simply a matter of recognising your own good qualities and acknowledging that you are a loveable person and that you are worthy of love.
Because no matter what you've been taught to believe, you are worthy of love.
And the most important person you need to receive that love from, more than anyone else, is YOU.
Benefits of Loving Yourself
Here's why loving yourself is the key to a good life and why the world needs you...
I'm reading "Becoming" by Michelle Obama and the words that keep coming up for me as I read are, she's a class act.
You’ve probably heard the term, "She’s a class act."
Of course, it's always a compliment. But what exactly does that mean?
Class is easy to recognise but much harder to define.
Equally, the absence of class is easy to detect -- and a serious flaw for anyone who aspires to be successful.
First of all, class is not an "act."
It's a deep-seated way of life for those who possess it.
Having class involves good manners, politeness, pride without showing off, empathy, humility, and an abundance of self-control.
The actions of class-act people speak louder than their words.
You can see it in their body language and the way they carry themselves.
Class always shows without being announced.
People can tell if you have class by the way you interact with others.
If you have ...
Wasn’t Te Matatini ki te Ao fabulous!
An awesome display and experience of Māori success, Māori excellence, Māori leadership, and whānau ora – both on and off the stage!
I was soooo pleased I went.
I almost didn’t.
And I’m not sure why I thought I couldn’t go?
Sometimes I think I’ve made a lot of progress with all this work on myself and then sometimes when I’m not looking, my old way of thinking kinda just pops up.
I used to be an “all or nothing” kinda person.
And I had it in my mind that I wasn’t going to Te Matatini even though Westpac Stadium is just down the road from my place!
You see it clashed with my daughter’s birthday and it’s whānau first for me.
My “all or nothing” thinking came from I either attend the whole four days or not go at all.
Crazy – right!
I only decided on the Monday before the event to go.
I checked in with my boss (me) to see if it was ok to have Thursday off work,...
I’m one of those people that likes to challenge myself.
I love learning, trying new things, and going outside my comfort zone (well… most of the time :)).
When you challenge yourself in different ways it keeps you on your toes, helps you stay sharp, and inspires you to grow in new ways.
Sometimes I take on too much at once - like in 2011 when I signed up to run the New York marathon and then enrolled in the MBA programme at the Waikato-Tainui College for Research and Development.
Thankfully I’ve learned from that experience.
Challenging yourself does not mean overworking yourself.
I’m learning to be more creative with my challenges like finding better ways to do things that I’ve done before, making myself think outside the box, letting go of conventions that I’ve lived by, and approaching old problems in new ways.
I’m also experimenting with changing my routines.
I used to get up at 6am every morning and workout.
I’ve changed my...
On Sunday, I went along to support a fundraising kaupapa that was important to a friend of mine.
I wasn’t sure what to expect as it was a show by a Māori band that, to be honest, was before my time. More my parent's era.
While I had heard of them, I hadn’t really followed them or seen them perform before.
So I went along on a sunny afternoon with an open heart and an open mind.
And I was in for a very pleasant afternoon.
I only knew one or two waiata that I could sing along to but I enjoyed their stories, their waiata, their presence.
They shared stories about their performances with other Māori artists such as Prince Tui Teka, Billy T James, John Rolls, and others.
I had so much fun just seeing how much fun they were having on stage, and how comfortable they were with being themselves.
Now in their seventies and eighties, I wondered what they must have been like in their heyday.
Actually, I could see it - fabulous entertainers, happy and comfortable sharing their gifts....
Let me be straight with you.
To be a stand out leader you have to make your leadership personal and have your sights set on what you want to do, be or have.
Then own it and cultivate it!
Leadership is not a theory.
You have to be who you are!
So... have you made the transition?
Have you done the work?
Are you clear on what your purpose is?
Are you clear on your leadership intent?
I wasn't always clear and I didn't think I had leadership qualities.
I thought I had to be or act as a leader modelled on the Western (male) view of leadership, have all these leadership attributes, hold a high-level position, and mix with the 'right' people before I could become a leader.
But did you know you can lead from wherever you are, right now?
It starts with getting clear about your leadership intent, getting sharp about it, and articulating it.
Highly effective leaders have a view.
It's about setting audacious goals, owning them, and making a plan.
Highly effective leaders always have a plan that...
Everyone has an opinion about goals and goal setting.
Some peeps love setting goals and swear by them.
Others hate them.
The only truth is that nothing works the way it should unless you do the work.
The same is often true about goals and their ultimate purpose.
Setting goals are not about the accomplishment itself.
It is also not just about "becoming the person required to attain those goals."
Although there’s nothing wrong with that.
I believe it’s much deeper and more important.
It’s about combining the determination to achieve with clear thinking while making sense of your purpose and defining your ability to deliver value to others.
Goals provide clarity.
We all know that when we have a clear vision or desire, taking the proper action is easier.
When you have to put the pen to paper, only the truth comes out.
Whatever is written becomes real.
Writing down goals helps you define who you really are.
Goals are tools that help us navigate ambiguous situations.
It’s that time of year again where people are setting their goals for the year striving to make positive changes in our lives.
It’s just what everyone does.
It’s almost expected that you overhaul your whole life or at least pretend you want to.
Then we gloss over the fact that most people abandon their new year resolutions before February 1st.
So where do you start?
You start by identifying if your resolutions are dreams or goals.
In the first month of my Kia Tū Teitei Monthly programme: January - Planning Your Best Year Ever, I share a seven-part framework for setting goals – the SMARTER Formula.
That's Specific, Measurable, Actionable, Risky, Time-keyed, Exciting and Relevant.
This formula is great for ensuring that you are setting goals and not just naming your dreams.
A goal would be to lose 10 kgs by May 1st by exercising four times per week with both cardio and strength training and eating 1800 calories per day (only an example) from mostly whole...
Last week I chaired the first day of the two day Women in Leadership Summit in Wellington.
There were over 80 attendees in the room with only a couple of wāhine Māori. No surprise really; the cost was well over $1,400 per day.
However what was interesting were the number of questions around confidence.
One woman came up to me during the networking session and said: "I don't know what was going on inside but on the outside you appeared calm."
"Yes," I said, "That's because I was".
I was calm because I put a lot of work in the lead up to the summit. I researched the various topics that were going to be covered. I prepared how I was going to introduce the speakers. I engaged with the panelists over email about the questions. I gave some thought to how I wanted the attendees to think and feel and what kind of experience I wanted them to have.
When I turned up on the day, I let go and went with the flow. I trusted myself.
I got lots of good feedback and someone said I owned it. And...
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